So I'm feeling better about state. So I'm going to write about the happy times, and my day now.

I woke up at 5am, and I had to be up at the school at 5:30am to leave for state. I was kinda late leaving my house, but whatever. I knew that the band wasn't leaving until 6am anyway. So I got to the school, gave my little sister her present. (Not my real little sister. I don't have one. In band, we do this big/little brother/sister thing. It's fun.) I got her basically a bag of candy with a letter. And she did the same thing.

On the bus ride down, I barely got any sleep. I brought my pillow, but I didn't have anything to lean against (like a window). So it was really hard to sleep. But I did get a few hours in.

Once we got to this middle school (to practice a little) we ate some food, and the seniors passed out senior letters. (The seniors always write letters to the juniors and underclassmen in their section.) I got like, 7 of them. Then we warmed up, got dressed, and practiced marching a little. After a while, we got on the buses, and I was starting to get really excited for state. It was finally the day.

We got to ISU (Illinois State University) and went to the warm-up field. We had our official warm-up, and then stood outside of the gate while we were waiting for the other band to end. And this is when all of the seniors started to cry. It was their last state, and they didn't want it to ever end. Well, when everyone standing around me was crying, my eyes began to tear up a little. And I just kept thinking to myself "I'm not going to cry. I can't." and I didn't.

We put our hats on, and started to get ready to march onto the field. While we were marching onto the field, the crowd was going insane! It was so loud. And they all couldn't wait to see us perform. It was an amazing feeling. Well, I went to my set, and stood there. My director called us to parade rest, so we all went there. But when our drum major called us to set, no one in the band heard them because the crowd was so loud. (It kind of looked bad, but not that bad.)

The show started, and all I could hear behind me was Mitch crying. And I couldn't take it. It was state, and the show started. It was intense, and I just couldn't help but start crying. And I never thought I would cry during state, but there I was marching the show, crying like a baby. And then when I turned around to play the first big hit, the crowd was so intense. It was the first time I actually saw it while on the field. And the stands were packed. They were screaming as loud as they could, and it was the most amazing feeling ever. And I couldn't even play because I was crying so hard. (And I may sound weird, but every upperclassmen in our band always cries because they're so connected to the show.)

As the show went on, I stopped crying later on in the opener because I knew I had to actually play. And I played my heart out. I did amazing during the show, and I couldn't have asked for a better one.

After the show ended, I marched off of the field. And right as I stepped off of that field, I just cried as hard as I could. And I didn't even know why. I didn't want to cry, but the feeling you get when you're on that field performing your show, and when you know it might be all over is so crazy. (And you'll think I'm weird, but I'm actually crying right now just thinking about this. I love it, lol.)You probably won't ever know what it's like unless you've marched at state with my band. We're like a family, and we love each other.

Well, we marched off of the field, and sang "Close Every Door". When we sing that song, it means that we did fricken amazing! And we did. It was the best show our band has ever had. When we were singing, tears were just streaming down my face. I couldn't help it. They just kept coming down.

Well, our director talked to us, we took pictures, and went back to the buses. Whenever my band goes to the buses after our performance, it's never normal. All of the parents and friends make a tunnel, and cheer for our whole band as we walk through them. It's really fun, and makes everyone feel like they did even better. My mom took more pictures of me, and then I got some food, visited with the band, parents, and old friends that came back from college.

It was time for the awards, and to see how good we did compared to everyone else in our class. We weren't expecting anything but 2nd place (because the band that always wins grand champion is in our class) and crowd appeal (because our crowd goes insane). We ended up getting both of those trophies. The people who we expected to get 1st got 1st, and we got 2nd. Later on, someone told my mom that my band should have gotten 1st, and that made me really proud. And I really wanted to know if I made finals. But I wouldn't know that for another 5 hours.

We went and ate a nice hot meal at a park (the whether was great) and it was really fun. But then our nap time was outside? Wtf? Oh, and when me and my friends went to go to the bathroom, there were no doors on the stalls. How nice, right? Well, it was an adventure.

Anyway, I couldn't sleep at all, because it was outside, it was light out, leaves were falling from the sky, and I wasn't tired at that moment. And we only had an hour. So it was pretty much like, what's the point if I'm only going to get an hour?

After nap time, we got on the buses, and went to a different school to rehearse for a few hours. The field was terrible! There were so many bumps, and there were potholes in the field. Several people almost rolled their ankles.

After that terrorizing rehearsal, we got dressed, got our instruments, and went on the buses to wait and hear if we made finals or not. If we made finals, we would go and warm-up. But if we didn't make finals, we were going home.

Well, I just got on the bus and sat down, when Mr. Barnett (a chaperon) told us to get off of the bus and Mr. Nommensen (our director) wanted to talk to us. Well, automatically I was scared. Either he wanted to talk to us all at once because it was terrible news, or he wanted to talk to us all at once because it was really good news. I even said out loud "I'm scared." to all of my friends, and I'm sure my director heard, I was really close to him.

So he started to talk, and this is what he said "Well, I wish" and just from that, I knew we didn't make it. He continued to say "Well, I wish I could say that this is a joke, and you made finals, but you didn't." I don't remember what he said after that, and I don't want to remember. At first, I didn't start crying, but I was REALLY shocked and disappointed. Every single person thought that we made finals. That was the best shows of our lives, and we thought that we would be having some more fun that night. Well we were all wrong.

As my director was talking, you could just look at the band, and see a lot of people crying. It was really heartbreaking to us. And it's still kind of a sensitive subject. I don't really like talking about it.

Well after that, we took off our uniforms, put everything away, cried, my parents called me, and I went home with my parents and cried more.

That night, I went to my room when I got home, watched the video of my show that my mom recorded, and cried myself to sleep. It was such a sad day.

Monday during band, my director let us listen to one of the judge's tapes, and he was complimenting us the whole time. At the end of it he says "I hope I can see you later tonight." And I just blurted out "Well then you should have judged us higher!!" It turns out that we were 0.15 points away from making finals. Several other bands that we've been beating all year made it in. And I'm pretty sure it's because of score inflation. Which is when they score the earlier bands lower to leave room for other bands to possibly be higher than you. And then they probably kind of forgot about us since we were so much earlier than the other bands that made it.

Well, now all we have to do is practice extremely hard, and show everyone at BOA (high school marching band regionals) that we are an amazing band.