There is some good news in the future though but I shall save that news until I know for sure. Suffice it to say that I am stepping up when it comes to being a grown woman and I could be getting help and more importantly, a friend to talk to. I have been sheltered too long. I only hope I do not do the same to the child I might have in the future. And as a child, I was eager to do what it took to keep my friends, even if it meant giving away my toys and clothes. I know that was wrong of me to do because if they really were my friends, they wouldn't of taken anything of mine away, even if I was willing and misguided by desperation. I guess there are times when I try to give away something I love even now. Why do I do this on occasion? Well, when I was little, I was scared of being alone, no one liking me, but as an adult, I do know I let go for the wrong reasons, because I was scared to say Yes, I am worth trying this, my life is worth seeing this throuogh and I won't be scared to try anymore. Of course when I was little, my friends loved getting things. When they got too much , they expected too much from and ended up broken when I had no more to give them. Did my friends appreciate what I gave them? Since I have lost touch with them, I will never know that answer. What I do know is that I have a right to keep what I cherish. And I cherish being a woman in progress and I like the fact I have so much to try in my life, not just hobbies but seeing the world, living my life in balance by expressing my femininity while not being afraid of 'getting my hands dirty' when helping others. Letting some things come on their own and becoming a woman with the right ambition when it is time. I cherish happiness, love, friendship, and compassion as well. Oh yeah, I am in love with the Nickelback song Far Away; it's on my myspace =)